


I Won't Say (I'm In Love)

by fandomsandanythingelse



Series: This is Home [9]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders is a Little Shit, Fluff with some angst, M/M, Songfic, Swearing, like a sprinkle of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:48:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26049811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomsandanythingelse/pseuds/fandomsandanythingelse
Summary: Janus might... actually love Patton? When did that happen?
Relationships: Deceit | Janus Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Series: This is Home [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1884430
Comments: 4
Kudos: 89





	I Won't Say (I'm In Love)

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from I Won't Say (I'm in Love) from the Hercules soundtrack

Janus stood up and stretched, thanking God that the PTA meeting was over and that it was the last one of the year. He headed over to the snack table to grab one of those pumpkin chocolate chip cookies Donna brought today. Yes, it was May, but that didn't mean that she couldn’t bring them, or that he couldn’t enjoy them.

“Hey, Janus?” Patton asked from behind him. He didn't know why, but since they’d gotten together, Janus always loved hearing the way Patton said his name.

“Yes darling?” he asked as he turned to face Patton.

“You’re going to pick Virgil up, right?”

“I was under the impression that I was going to wait until the end of play practice, then take you, Roman, and Remus to go get him and Logan.”

“Yeah, well I totally forgot that I have the end of year meeting with the principal today, and I know you’re my vice president, but it’s kind of just me and him talking for a bit, and I-”

“You want me to go get Logan and Virgil, then come and get you and the boys.”

“Would you?” Patton asked, giving Janus a puppy-dog face as though he’d actually say no.

“Of course, darling.” Janus kissed Patton softly, then grabbed a couple of cookies for the road.

“Thank you so much,” Patton said. He leaned over and kissed Janus’ cheek. “I’ll see you later, love you.”

And then he was gone, leaving Janus frozen in his spot. /Love you./ Patton had just… said it. It was probably just a reflex, something like that. Right? Because he was used to saying it to his kids, probably just some habit.

Unless he meant it. Oh god, what if he meant it?

“Jay?” someone asked. Janus shook himself.

“Yes?”

Debbie was looking at him with a small smirk. “You alright?”

Janus huffed and adjusted his jacket. “Don’t look at me like that.”

She continued to look at him like that. “You’re so gay for him, Janus.”

“And you’re so gay for your wife, leave me alone about it.”

Debbie just laughed and walked away. Janus rolled his eyes and walked out of the PTA room to go get his son. And his boyfriend’s son. Don’t forget about him.

* * *

Janus pulled up to the middle school where Virgil and Logan were already waiting. Virgil hopped up into the front seat, while Logan got into the very back of the minivan, as Roman and Remus’ boosters were in the middle seats.

“Hey dad,” Virgil said as Janus started driving away.

“Wait are you seriously gonna ask him?” Logan asked.

“Duh. Do you want to know or not?”

“What’s this about?” Janus asked.

“Well, you’ve been dating Patton for a while now…” Virgil said slowly.

“Why do I get the feeling I’m not going to like where this is going?

“Do you love him?”

Janus sighed. First Donna, and now his own son? “I’m not answering that.”

“Oh my god, you do!”

“What? How do you know?” Logan asked.

“He’s avoiding answering, and he’s blushing,” Virgil said to Logan, then to Janus, “You love Patton!”

“Virgil.”

“You love him, you love him, you love him,” Virgil started chanting, turning back to egg Logan on. Logan, of course, joined him.

“None of us are in second grade,” Janus tried to say, but he was drowned out by the repeated chorus of “You love him, you love him, you love him!”

Janus was grateful when he pulled up at the elementary school and saw Patton standing there with Roman and Remus.

“Alright, both of you shut up. Virgil, in the back.”

“Why? So you can sit next to the love of your life?”

“Because Patton is an adult, and adults get priority seating. In the back.”

Virgil rolled his eyes and got out of the front seat to open the back door. He climbed into the very back with Logan, while Roman and Remus got into their booster seats.

“Dad dad dad dad,” Remus started saying as soon as he was buckled in.

“Yes, Remus?” Janus asked.

“No! Daddy said it’s a secret, you can’t tell him!”

Janus glanced over as Patton buckled his seatbelt. He gave the boys an exasperated look, then looked at Janus apologetically.

“What did Daddy say was a secret?” Janus asked, still looking at Patton as he started driving.

“It’s nothing! Kids just say the darndest things, don’t they?” Patton asked.

“Patton, you know I l-” Janus paused, a little shocked at how easily the _I love you_ almost slipped out. “You know I think you’re sweet, but you’re a terrible liar.”

Patton’s smile fell a fraction of an inch, and Janus felt as though he’d fucked up. 

And then Remus screamed, “PATTON SAYS HE LOVES YOU!”

“Right in my ear, Remus,” Janus said, putting his hand to it.

“Sorry.”

Janus looked over at Patton who was blushing and looking down at his lap. “It’s something we can talk about later, okay?”

Patton looked over at Janus with a soft smile. “Okay.”

“Mr. Janus, can we play Disney music?” Roman asked.

“You know you don’t have to call me Mr. Janus anymore, Roman,” Janus said, looking back at him in the mirror.

“It’s polite.”

“You don’t have to be polite with me. God knows my kids aren’t,” he added under his breath, earning a small chuckle from Patton.

“If we’re playing Disney music, can I pick a song?” Virgil called from the back.

“If you’re going to be a little shithead like you were earlier, then absolutely not.”

“Swear jar,” Patton said, and Janus rolled his eyes.

“Please?” Virgil asked

“Ugh, fine.” Janus turned onto the freeway, making sure to stay focused on the road.

“I’ve got a Disney playlist on my phone,” Patton said as he pulled his phone out and pulled his music up. He handed his phone back to Roman. “Pass it to Virgil?”

Roman took the phone and passed it to Virgil. Janus did his best to focus on driving, but in the rearview mirror, he could see Virgil and Logan whispering and giggling.

“What’s going on back there?”

“Nothing.” Virgil passed the phone back up. Patton took it and looked at the song choice, frowning a little. He turned back and looked at the boys.

“Just play it, Patton,” Virgil said.

Patton shrugged and plugged the aux cord in, then hit play.

_ If there’s a price for rotten judgment, _

_ I think I’ve already won that. _

Janus sighed. Mutiny, that’s what this was.

_ No man is worth the aggravation _

_ That’s ancient history, been there, done that. _

And then it had to get worse because then both Virgil and Logan started singing.

_ Who d'you think you're kidding _

_ He's the earth and heaven to you _

_ Try to keep it hidden, _

_ Honey, we can see right through you _

Well, if they were going to be like this, Janus could totally play their game. He sang Meg’s, “Oh no,” smiling a little when he saw the look on Patton’s face.

_ Girl, you can't conceal it _

_ We know how you're feeling _

_ Who you thinking of _

_ “ _ No chance no way I won't say it, no no.”

_ You swoon, you sigh, why deny it, oh oh _

By this point, even Roman and Remus were attempting to sing along, though it was kind of obvious they didn't actually know what the Muses were saying.

“It's too cliche. I won't say I'm in love.” Janus glanced over at Patton, who wasn’t singing but watching him fondly.

“I thought my heart had learned its lesson;

“It feels so good when you start out

“My head is screaming ‘Get a grip girl,

“‘Unless you're dying to cry your heart out.’”

_ Girl, you can't deny it _

_ Who you are is how you're feeling _

_ Baby, we're not buying _

_ Hon, we saw you hit the ceiling _

_ Face it like a grown-up _

_ When you gonna own up that you got got got it bad? _

“Oh, no chance, no way. I won't say it, no no.”

_ Give up, give in, check the grin you're in love! _

“This scene won't play. I won't say I'm in love.”

_ You’re doing flips, read our lips, you’re in love! _

“You're way off base I won't say it.

“Get off my case I won't say it!”

And then Patton put his hand on Janus’ thigh and sang, “Girl don't be proud, it's okay you're in love.”

Janus glanced up at him, trying to convey everything he was too afraid to say into the last line, “Oh, at least out loud I won't say I'm in love.”

Patton smiled, and Janus could see how happy he truly was in the moment before he had to look back at the road. Some other song, probably just as sappy, came on, but Janus wasn’t paying attention. He was too busy thinking about the fact that he’d probably just inadvertently told Patton he loved him, and the look in Patton’s eyes.

And then it hit him. It had been years since Janus had felt like this. When that feeling of love wasn’t accompanied by the pain of heartbreak.

Maybe he could relate more to Meg than he’d originally thought.

“Jay?” Patton was looking at him with that damn soft look that made Janus melt.

“We can talk about it later, okay?”

“Okay.”


End file.
